How to create a life of success
We all want success, right? Some of us may have success stories abundant! (For those in that camp, please share your stories with the group!) Others may still be in search of "that thing" that will give success. Either way, we all would like to look back over our lives and feel proud of what we have achieved.
Before I get to ideas on creating a successful life, it is only appropriate to review the meanings of success.
What is Success after-all?
Merriam-Webster defines success as:
a favorable or desired outcome
the attainment of wealth, favor or eminence
The World defines success all in numbers, definitely echoing the second connotation above.
Number of likes, connections or shares you have on social media.
Amount of money you make or spend.
Personally, I define success in terms of joy. The amount of joy I feel during, and at the conclusion of, projects, work, and ultimately of life. The greater joy I feel during any period enables me to feel more personally successful.
The most interesting to me is the history of the word Success. Of the Latin word, successus, it was first used in 1537 and it meant outcome or result. Historically speaking then, success meant anything that has come to conclusion. Along this connotation, we can understand Success as we understand Beauty - it is all in the eye of the beholder.
Therefore, how I define success and how you define success are, can be, and potentially should be, different.
How do I create success?
I'm not here to give you the "Top 5 You Must Do to Generate Success", that will inevitably end up on that list of "Things I Need to Get Better at Doing". I'm here to offer a few thoughts on the continual life process of shaping success, and how to ward off the enemies of that success.
If you find yourself in the camp of still searching for success, or "that thing" that will bring you success, perhaps it can be found with a shift in your definition and working towards one conclusion. Or, possibly success can be achieved through outlining clear and manageable milestones for yourself and working towards them with focus. Lastly, success may be found when you stop comparing yourself with others.
First, consider that any outcome is a success.
It means you have dedicated yourself fully to bringing a project, task, or job to a finite conclusion. You didn't give up half way through. It could be said that the only finite enemy to success is accepting defeat, before the finish. And, not only is it unfair to assess success or failure by a job that wasn't completed; it is not possible. If the work is only half done, you actually have no idea what the real outcome could have been. By working on something to full completion, you get several positive benefits; regardless if the numbers actually match your goal.
For the purpose of I will use the Success-Collective website as the example.
Learning: You learn through the process. You gain new skills or refine existing ones. The next time you walk through the same exercise or task, you will do it better.
I've never built or ever worked on building a website. I learned that different web-builder sites exist and offer different functionality and resources. I now understand when to use a .jpg vs a .png image. And I certainly have a renewed appreciation for knowing and understanding, and speaking or selling to, my audience!
Assessment: With a completed result, you now have the opportunity to fully evaluate, assess and collect feedback. Is there something you would have differently? Does it look, feel, work the way you want it to? Who can test your product, idea, and provide input on how it could be enhanced?
Now that Success-Collective is online; I want to include a Forum section, enable comments on posts, and consider the benefit of having a Member Login. My intent is to grow to a community of working women (and men) who are striving towards excellence. Do you, as my audience have input for me? Are there topics you want me to cover? Are you interested in personal stories on my career? Would you like to hear from guest authors?
Bragging Rights: You get to say, "I just ____, for the first time, and I actually finished it."
"I just built a website and blog for the first time. I actually envisioned it, built it, wrote my first and second post, and published it!
All three of these are equally rooted in the concept of reflection. It is important for us to reflect back on things we have accomplished, understand "how" we accomplished them so we can confidently do it again, consider small tweaks, and generate self-confidence by sharing with others.
Secondly, don't underestimate the power of manageable and clear milestones.
Are you defining success for yourself only by the outcome? If all you are looking at is the end goal; ultimately, all you see is the gap. That, in and of itself, can be very defeating; and draining, depending on how frequently the goal is set. Additionally, you don't have a road map or path to follow. This can lead to quitting, or another great enemy of success: distraction.
This will deeply resonate with my readers who are sales professionals. Each year, you get a target, a number that is hung over your head. And often times, leadership will employ outcome management styles. In Sales, we call this managing by Lagging Indicators. You either hit your number, or you didn't. This gives you as the pursuer of "success" no roadmap or daily affirmations in your pursuit.
For my sports fans out there, this would be like the coach of the [insert your favorite team] telling his/her players the goal is to win the [insert name of the championship game]; but, not actually giving any further commentary, guidance or steps to get there. Every practice only includes a restatement of the goal. I'm not a sports aficionado by any means; but I definitely see the insanity in this.
In sports and in sales, there are clear milestones, or "Leading Indicators", that not only ensure achievement of success; but, also provide a controllable measuring stick.
Personally, I can speak with greater authority on the types of sales activities, over the types of sports practice activities that walk us down a path leading to success.
Clearly defining who and what represents the ideal client
Having focused conversations with these prospective clients to understand their challenges and needs
Conducting a demo of your product and service for those prospects
Presenting your prospective client, a price proposal
I know, this isn't rocket science and perhaps seems too specific and not relatable to life outside of sales. But, remember, I believe we are ALL selling something.
Setting these clear and manageable milestones provides something you can strive towards daily. It gives the start of each day a clear path with purpose, and enables a celebration at the end of every day when you have achieved results. Additionally, it helps keep you focused on what is most important. Each day in business inevitably will provide numerous distractions. With your outline of the most important things to accomplish in a certain amount of time, you can ward off that enemy of success.
Lastly, stop comparing yourself to others.
This is probably the most detrimental enemy of success. For three clear, but related, reasons:
Multiple Definitions: Even Webster's has more than one definition. This means what I personally believe is success, will be different than what you believe.
The Cover doesn't represent the contents: You may be achieving what I believe to be success, but you may still inside feel like a failure.
We are each unique: What makes each one of us unique is what makes us valuable.
Years ago, my father said to me:
"Caroline, don't compare your insides to other people's outsides."
This wisdom is something I have reflected on often. It helps me remember that when I am feeling drown trodden, or like I have failed something, looking at others only makes it worse. For all I can see of them, is what they choose to share. For all I know, they may be equally feeling failure and disappointment.
Living in a world that defines success in the numbers and where everything is online for all to see, it is hard not to compare ourselves. But, think on this. We are in a time in where we are striving for a world that doesn't judge us by the outside. Why on earth, then, should we inflict that kind of judgement on ourselves.
What do I do with my success?
Share it.
As I wrote on my “About” page, my life mantra is: Collectively we succeed. Collectively we fail.
What this means is, no matter the outcome we are in it together. I live this out in a career setting more than personal, but could be applicable in both.
For today, let’s just look at the broader meaning inside of a company. The company has an overall all goal and annual target. The leaders receive their targets, which are cascaded down to each individual employee. Everyone then goes on their way to chasing the goal. Head down, laser focused, do my best attitude. At the end of the year, each person is then measured and their success “defined” by that target achievement. Invariably, there are those that kill their target and those that miss it; coupled with the applicable reward/punishment currently in play for the organization. And the cycle repeats itself. Likely with the same few killing it, and the same few struggling - and maybe the rest in the middle.
Considering you have some on both side of the Success Fence, it could mean missing targets as a whole. AND, having employees frustrated with their own personal lack of achievement.
But what happens when we share? We learn from each other. Everyone gets better. And maybe next year the cycle doesn’t repeat itself.
If you are finding success in your life, share it with us! Tell us how you made it happen, or who inspired you? You have Bragging Rights!
That is my shameless ask and Call-To-Action for sharing on Success-Collective.
Comments